In the interest on honesty I have to admit that I’ve been a little challenged this week when it’s come to some emotional subjects. I’d like to think the full moon on Tuesday had something to do with it, but I’m not sure that’s entirely the case. I acknowledge that I am a sensitive person and as such I really work hard to temper my emotions. But this week, it was as if I could feel myself getting agitated and upset and knew the slippery slope ahead of me, but instead of walking away and taking a few extra deep breaths (because the deep breaths were certainly happening I just needed more) I stayed with the emotional upheaval…in a kind, compassionate way of course.
On the other hand, there were other situations this week where I was able to tap in to my breath, stay grounded and push forward with faith and optimism. When the daunting stories and negative self-talk started to bubble up, I quickly turned it around with kind, nurturing words rather than the battering onslaught of negativity that sometimes prevails. I’m happy with the progress there.
But then again, I’m happy with the progress in the first situation as well. Yes, the first is not ideal and certainly by now you would think I’d have a grip on certain emotional triggers, but you know what…here’s a big secret…I’m human and not perfect and can’t always expect myself to make the best choices or temper the right reaction. I can however, continue to work towards a faster “recovery time” and work on managing these situations one day at a time. In fact, I’m more proud of myself for going through that emotional and stressful situation and coming out on the other side with a little more clarity and learning something. I’m completely humbled by that experience, but won’t allow me to beat up on me. This is part of the learning process and practice after all, isn’t it?
What I’m trying to say is that no matter how long you practice, there will still be situations where you may not react in a way that is completely ideal and that’s okay. However, the lesson you walk away with and that little extra bit of clarity that makes all of the difference. Have you ever found yourself saying “why does this keep happening to me?” Well, here’s my thought on this…perhaps the same situations or patterns keep arising because we’re not learning and growing from the situation at hand. These are our karmas after all. The next time you find yourself saying this, stop and try to see the situation in a different light and you may find your true Self moving you in another direction.
Onwards and upwards!